‘Tis the Season to be…Mary

Photo courtesy of Whitmer Photography

How would you feel if you had portrayed an historical figure for nearly two decades and then discovered that in God’s mysterious providence you might actually be related to her?

Last summer I was astonished to discover that my maternal great-grandfather, Karl Bachmann, was Jewish.  Who knew? Mom’s grandfather, a German-speaking immigrant from Switzerland, died when my grandmother was a baby. My dad’s parents as well as mom’s father were Norwegian, so my sibs and I grew up in a Scandinavian tradition.  But not long before my Uncle Ed died at 90, he mentioned their mother’s father’s heritage to his youngest sister, my mother. When she told us we have a Jewish ancestor I nearly fell over.

Why? Because all these years I’ve struggled with the oddity of being a middle-aged Norwegian-American preacher’s wife running around the country portraying a Jewish teenage virgin.

“I’m too old!” I said to the Lord (this when I was only 40). “And I’m the wrong ethnicity!” I whined.  How can a blue-eyed Scandinavian credibly portray a middle-eastern Jewish mother?

Even Jahweh can only take so much complaining (especially when it comes from a woman whom I know now is genetically wired to kvetch.)

So when I was 57 years old, He let the bomb drop. “Too old?” He said. “You think I can’t use older people however I choose? What about Sarah and Elizabeth?

“And the wrong ethnicity? Well, my little nudnik, guess what? You’ve been Jewish all along. Mazel Tov!”

Ok, the conversation didn’t go EXACTLY that way, but I swear I heard Him laugh.

So…where does a new Jewish girl go to enroll in Judaism 101? You ask a rabbi, of course.

When I was in Washington, D.C. this past January for the annual March for Life, I spotted one. A rabbi, that is, and one most satisfyingly of the Orthodox persuasion. Black coat, distinctive flat hat, long payot (side-curls) and all. And just to make sure I didn’t miss the opportunity, he was holding a sign proclaiming “New York Rabbis for Life.”

Perfect! I thought. A real live rabbi standing right in front of me. Just the one to answer my questions!

So I ran up to him and tugged on his sleeve to get his attention.  He turned around with a smile that became stern when he saw who had touched him.

(Oops, my first mistake. I think I read somewhere that women are not supposed to touch rabbis.)

“Rabbi,” I said with my best Gentile chutzpah. “It’s good to see you here! I am pro-life too and I have just discovered that I have a Jewish heritage.”

His expression became one of interest. Wagging a long finger at me, he inquired, “Is it through your mother’s mother? If so then yes, you are a Jew.”

Thrilled, I said, “So Rabbi, what do I do next?”

“Why, get yourself to an Orthodox temple to study,” he responded.

“That would be difficult, Rabbi,” I responded. “You see, my husband is a Baptist preacher.”

(Oops, second mistake. Do not say Baptist and preacher in the same sentence when you are trying to score points with a rabbi.)

You know what they say about fools rushing in, so I sealed my fate.

“I guess that makes me a Messianic Jew!” I said brightly.

End of conversation.

So I suppose that makes me a bad Jew.  But you know what? God is used to schlemiels like me.

I did get myself to an orthodox temple to study. It’s called Wheaton Graduate School. Maybe it’s not quite what the rabbi had in mind, but I’m spending all year immersed in the Torah, or what we goyim call the Older Testament.

And as a student of Torah and a lover of the Jewish Jesus, I know that Yahweh can use anybody, anytime, in any way He so chooses. He always has. Always will.

Maybe He has a surprise in your future too. Mazel Tov!

Photos courtesy of Whitmer Photography, Wheaton, IL

A Heart of Thanksgiving: Giving Credit Where Credit is Due

I did it again. Forgot to enter a check in the check register, that is.

 My long-suffering husband peered at me over the top of his reading glasses from the table where he was attempting to balance the checkbook. “What check do you suppose we failed to record?” he asked, tactful soul that he is. “Unless we remember, our account won’t balance again this month.” Sighing, I pulled out my day planner and began to mentally retrace the places I might have been with checkbook in hand.

Balance. It’s important in a checking account, and even more so in life. I looked up balance in the dictionary recently, and was struck by two different denotations of the word.

Balance can stand for steadiness of purpose – rejecting the extremes. I love the balanced guidance that God promises us in Isaiah 30:21: “Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, ‘This is the way; walk in it.’”

But balance has a second meaning as well: equality between the debits and the credits in an account. When the debits in my checking account exceed the credits, it cannot balance. I am overdrawn.

Life is like that as well. I easily become ‘overdrawn’ when my spiritual debits seem to be outstanding – debits such as unconfessed sin, lack of forgiveness, and self-centeredness. Each area is like an outstanding check in my spiritual account.

I’m grateful for the way God keeps the books, though. He adds credit to my account just like Mike and I used to make deposits to our son’s checking account in college. The key to true credit is found in the book of Romans, particularly Romans 4:3: “Abraham believed God, and it was credited to him as righteousness.”

The legal term quid pro quo can be translated “something in exchange for something.” God made a covenant with Abraham, and Abraham believed Him. What did he receive in return for his faith: quid pro quo? Righteousness.

God has made a new covenant with us through the blood of Jesus (Rm. 10:9,10). If we confess He is Lord and believe in His name, quid pro quo? Salvation!

When we truly realize, therefore, that everything credited to our account has been placed there by God, it is time to – quite literally – give credit where credit is due.

Isn’t that what Thanksgiving is all about?

- copyright 2009 Maggie W. Rowe

Image courtesy of Mary Whitmer

Maggie’s Top Ten Time-Savers – Part Deux

Jim and Michelle Duggar - with child #20 on the way - are experts at time management. (And I think I'm busy?!)

Last week I posted five time-management helps that actually work for me. Following are my final five.

For those who asked about my photo of the Scottish sundial, the inscription reads: “Neither can the wave that has passed by be recalled – nor the hour which has passed return again.”

There’s nothing new under the sun (dial), of course. People have been frittering away time ever since Eve wandered away from her gardening to shoot the breeze with a serpent.

 I’m a slow learner so the following tips may not be new to you, but they help a recovering procrastinator like me keep my sanity at least some of the time:

(5). Pull the plug. No TV. Nada. Zilch. Ten years from now I will not regret that I didn’t watch more television. I get my morning news from the Chicago Tribune and during the day online news alerts will warn me if a tornado is bearing down on Wheaton or aliens invade the planet. 

(4). Buy in bulk. If I could invest in stocks I’d put some money in Costco. They sure have plenty of mine. But for a family who likes to open our home to groups and guests, I can’t do without the place. Once a month I make a lunch-hour run to stock up on canned pet food, TP, paper towels, greeting cards and staples. It keeps me out of stores most of the rest of the month.

(3). Take 5. Five-minute jobs that is. I have a natural tendency to recoil from clutter, rationalizing that I’ll get to it when I have time. That moment may never come. So I’m learning to do what I can for five minutes while I’m waiting for a pot to boil or before I leave for class. Gradually the piles are getting smaller.

(2). Refill your own well.  You can’t fill others’ cups if you’re spiritually dry yourself.  Corporate worship, personal quiet time and making memories with Mike are priorities for me. If I neglect those key relationships in order to try to meet everyone else’s needs, I will soon run dry.

Speaking at the Catalyst conference in Atlanta last month, Andy Stanley commented: “You can’t shut it all out but you can’t take it all on. You do for the one or the few what you wish you could do for the many. You can empty your own cup but you can’t fill up somebody else’s life.”

 (1). Show up for your life. Attend to the moment you are living right now wherever you are, whether you’re commuting to work, caring for a child, or tackling a project. Savoring time is the best way to save it.

And what if you heartily dislike the life-season you’re in and wish it would pass more quickly? We’ve all been there. Some days you just want to close your eyes, click your heels and wish yourself out of your present state of mind.

Choose to live life with your eyes wide open instead.  When you’re caring for that child, study his face. If you’re helping someone else, remember how often you’ve received assistance. And on that commute to work leave the radio off and savor the silence.

My friend Pam sent me a tip for a future post. Anyone else have a favorite time-saving or savoring tip to share?

Maggie’s Top Ten Time-Savers

Saw this sundial last month in St. Andrews, Scotland - love the sentiment

Time not only flies, but these days it’s got frequent-flyer credits on more carriers than ever.

So where’s the hope when you’ve got too much to do and too little of you to go around?

In last week’s post  I mentioned that I’ve been using some time-saving tips to help me navigate a full-time day job, evening grad classes and weekend ministry. I’ve always appreciated reading other people’s life management hints and helps. Even if I don’t learn anything radically new at least I know I’m on the right track. (Until I see the lights of that oncoming train, anyway…)

So following for your delectation are Maggie’s Top Ten Time-Savers (in reverse order:)

(10.) Resist vegging. Vegetables are for eating, not emulating.

 What, one protests, you’re preaching that a working woman or man can’t even collapse on the couch after a long day’s work or when the wee bairns are napping? Mais non, this is not what Miss Maggie means. Instead she suggests that you resist reaching for the remote when you collapse. Take 5, heave a big sigh, count a blessing or two and go on to the next thing.

(9.) Use clutter contraceptives. Don’t let paperwork, dishes, and just-worn clothing meet their kin in the hollers of your home or they will breed in a shameful way. Seriously.

Sort the mail as soon as it comes in. Corral the clutter in baskets in case you need to stash it out of sight till you can put it away. Start at the 12:00 position in a messy room and work your way around the room clockwise in 5 minute slices of time until surfaces are clear.

(8.) Separate tasks into segments. Do you have a major paper due for school or project at work? Are you dallying when it comes to sorting through your kids’ outgrown clothing? Plan to do one part of the dreaded task right away so you stop fretting about it.  Look sternly at the date when you need the job finished and then budget small, steady segments of time to tackle it.  (Golly this is so unoriginal, but IT WORKS.)

(7.)  Write it down. Get all that minutiae out of your brain and onto a list. Use your Outlook online calendar to organize your day. Carry a month-at-a-glance planner with you and plot out your priorities. Put a 5 x 8 spiral notebook with your Bible and take it with you to church so you can note who needs a call, a card or a prayer.

(6.) Cut yourself some slack. (Nope, this does not negate Anti-Vegging #1.)  When a rope is continually taut the stress causes it to fray. Perfectionism can be insecurity masking as achievement. Even Good Housekeeping magazine now instructs its readers on what’s “good enough.”

Try picking one of these to try this week and let me know how it goes. Better yet, send me your own time tips. Next Tuesday I’ll post my Final Five.

 

Do You Want Fries with That?

While at a weekend women’s conference on the East Coast two weeks ago, I sat in on a seminar given by a gifted young friend whom I’ve known since she was a little girl. Though 20 years my junior, Kristi has learned a principle I still struggle with: how to say “no” with the same confidence with which I say yes.

Kristi labels our tendency to take on too much the “Do-you-want-fries-with-that?” syndrome. The marketing people are clever. They know that consumers nearly always want more when it’s offered. But the temptation to supersize our lives doesn’t just present itself at drive-through windows. It grabs us by the collar continually.

In her thoughtful new book Invitations from God (Intervarsity Press 2011),  author and pastor Adele Ahlberg Calhoun reminds us:

“The things we say yes to and the things we say no to determine the terrain of our future. My convoluted journey is posted with invitations, and my RSVP’s account for the twists and turns. Sometimes, half in love with my own self-destruction, I see a sign inviting me to “Stop!” – and I blow right through it anyway. Life is happening somewhere other than where I am, and I fear missing out on it.”

In my two-plus decades of ministry to women I have attended countless seminars, and given them, on balancing family, work, and volunteer commitments. My present state of thinking? Toss out the concept. Balance is a function of weights and measures, not time management. In certain seasons of life when my kids were small or when we had five teens at home, the scales were heavily skewed towards home. I not only needed to be there – I wanted to be. I don’t regret a moment of the time invested in the development of the precious human lives entrusted to my care.

With the kids grown and on their own, the scales tip outside my home. I am fortunate to have work in a field I am passionate about plus a new opportunity to study scripture on the graduate level. I will not complain about how “busy” I am (scold me if you catch me doing it). Full-time work and grad school guzzle gallons of time but I have no regrets. Yet important as these commitments are, RSVP’ing to relationships are a daily priority. Talking to God. Creating memories with Mike. Skyping with my kids. Serving alongside my faith family.

My persistent,fervent prayer these days is Lord, let me use my time wisely and well. I benefit from others’  time management secrets (thank you Kristi!), so next week I’ll share some tips that are helping me navigate my days.

But in the meantime, I’m learning to slow down internally even as life is speeding up.

I’ve got my daily bread and my Living Water and no, thank you very much ma’am, I don’t need fries with that.